A little over a week ago, on a Friday, when I got home, I decided I would take the dog out for a walk/run. It would be the first time since I got the dreaded boot off about 3 weeks earlier. I am really not supposed to be exercising yet, but I cannot stand the extra weight I have put on. I am flabbier than I have been in years, and while I try to pretend that I don’t give a shit, I do. I changed into workout clothes and tried to get enthusiastic. I set out with my bluetooth over-the-ear headphones on, and was holding my giant iPhone 6+ in one hand, and had the dog’s leash in the other. It did actually cross my mind that this was a recipe for disaster prior to leaving the house, yet I trudged on. The dog is not really accustomed to walking or running on a regular basis. I was struggling early on. I should have just walked. Par for the course, my phone started blowing up with text messages. One was from Mini Me. It said, “Hypothetically, if I were in Athens, could Clint get me a discount at Amici?” Mini Me lives in Nashville, Tennessee, where he is a student at Belmont University. Just what the hell would he be doing in Athens, Georgia? Never mind that. I texted back, “Hypothetically, you cannot afford to go to Athens, or eat at Amici. And, I can’t talk right now.” I finally got up to Evans Road, which is the flat part of my route, and I started a slow run. I ignored the texts that came in afterward. I was surprised that I was able to run at all. It had literally been months. It was going well! The dog was on my left. We were running up the sidewalk, and apparently I had my music up too loud to hear the truck that was coming up behind me. The dog moved quickly moved over in front of me and stopped dead. I tripped over her and face planted into the sidewalk. My phone bounced and landed about three feet in front of me, along with my bluetooth over-the-ear headphones. I think I actually bounced on impact. Luckily, I had wrapped the leash around my arm. I just laid there on the pavement–I was seeing stars. I had hit my chin and the left side of my left hand first. Both arms and both knees were also skinned up badly. I finally sat up, for fear of who might be driving by. Then, I realized that if anyone who knew me was actually driving by and did not stop to see if I was okay, that was really shitty on their part. I finally picked myself up and dusted myself off. Damn, that hurt a lot worse than it used to when I was a kid! It took me a minute to get moving. I picked up my phone off the pavement. The day before, I had peeled off the nasty, broken screen cover. Like an idiot. Now, the screen itself was shattered. Served me right, I decided. I picked up my headphones and put them around my neck. I damn sure wasn’t going to run anymore and wished there was somebody I could call to come pick my ass up and drive me the half mile home. I decided to call Mini Me. I need some sympathy–not that he is the one that I regularly call for that! 🙂 He surprised me, though. Mom! Are you okay? Are you sure? I assured him I was fine and thanked him for his concern. “I need to know something and please be honest,” I said, “are you in Athens?” He did not hesitate. “Yes, ma’am. I came to see Oteil play. I have a good grade in French and my math class was canceled.” There was no way I could argue with that. Do you know how many times I went on road trips from Athens, Georgia??? And I can guarandamntee you I did NOT call my Mothah and ask her if could. AND…I don’t think I would have been honest if she had asked me. Then…he says this to me….”I called Dad and asked him about it…” I said, “Oh really? And what did Dad say?”… Thinking that Dad had no room to say a word about it just like I didn’t. “Dad said that I couldn’t call home and ask stuff like that. He said I had to make those decisions for myself. So since I have a good grade in French and my math class was canceled, I decided to go.” Damn. I would have gone if I was failing French and Math and neither were canceled, and I would never have called and asked Mothah or Daddy, because I knew what they would both say, and that was this: HELL TO THE NO! So. In that moment, I was proud. I was proud of Mini Me, and dammit, I was proud of ME! I must be doing something right!, Right? I mean, he could have been lying his ass off. I get that. We won’t really know until grades come out. But, I can have this teeny weeny little time of satisfaction in a job well done, can’t I? Can’t I????
Let me say that I am not stupid. I know that Mini Me is definitely not sitting up in Nashville, reading a Bible and going to bed at 8pm. Please. Why do you think I call him Mini Me? 🤪 Also, notice that the title says “Maybe I am doing something right” not “Maybe I am doing everything right” because GOD KNOWS and I know I certainly am not doing and have definitely not done everything right! Who has? Show me that person so I can beat their ass. Finally, a couple of days after he got home from his little trip to Athens, MM texted me this pic. He said, “Look! I was featured on UGA’s Instagram!” I had to laugh. My kid. I do love him so.