A little over a week ago, on a Friday, when I got home, I decided I would take the dog out for a walk/run.  It would be the first time since I got the dreaded boot off about 3 weeks earlier.  I am really not supposed to be exercising yet, but I cannot stand the extra weight I have put on.  I am flabbier than I have been in years, and while I try to pretend that I don’t give a shit, I do.  I changed into workout clothes and tried to get enthusiastic.  I set out with my bluetooth over-the-ear headphones on, and was holding my giant iPhone 6+ in one hand, and had the dog’s leash in the other.  It did actually cross my mind that this was a recipe for disaster prior to leaving the house, yet I trudged on.  The dog is not really accustomed to walking or running on a regular basis.  I was struggling early on.  I should have just walked.  Par for the course, my phone started blowing up with text messages.  One was from Mini Me.  It said, “Hypothetically, if I were in Athens, could Clint get me a discount at Amici?” Mini Me lives in Nashville, Tennessee, where he is a student at Belmont University.  Just what the hell would he be doing in Athens, Georgia? Never mind that. I texted back, “Hypothetically, you cannot afford to go to Athens, or eat at Amici. And, I can’t talk right now.”  I finally got up to Evans Road, which is the flat part of my route, and I started a slow run. I ignored the texts that came in afterward.  I was surprised that I was able to run at all.  It had literally been months.  It was going well!  The dog was on my left.  We were running up the sidewalk, and apparently I had my music up too loud to hear the truck that was coming up behind me.  The dog moved quickly moved over in front of me and stopped dead.  I tripped over her and face planted into the sidewalk.  My phone bounced and landed about three feet in front of me, along with my bluetooth over-the-ear headphones.  I think I actually bounced on impact.  Luckily, I had wrapped the leash around my arm.  I just laid there on the pavement–I was seeing stars.  I had hit my chin and the left side of my left hand first.  Both arms and both knees were also skinned up badly.  I finally sat up, for fear of who might be driving by.  Then, I realized that if anyone who knew me was actually driving by and did not stop to see if I was okay, that was really shitty on their part.  I finally picked myself up and dusted myself off.  Damn, that hurt a lot worse than it used to when I was a kid!  It took me a minute to get moving.  I picked up my phone off the pavement.  The day before, I had peeled off the nasty, broken screen cover.  Like an idiot.  Now, the screen itself was shattered.  Served me right, I decided.  I picked up my headphones and put them around my neck.  I damn sure wasn’t going to run anymore and wished there was somebody I could call to come pick my ass up and drive me the half mile home.  I decided to call Mini Me.  I need some sympathy–not that he is the one that I regularly call for that! 🙂  He surprised me, though. Mom! Are you okay? Are you sure? I assured him I was fine and thanked him for his concern.  “I need to know something and please be honest,” I said, “are you in Athens?” He did not hesitate. “Yes, ma’am. I came to see Oteil play. I have a good grade in French and my math class was canceled.”  There was no way I could argue with that.  Do you know how many times I went on road trips from Athens, Georgia??? And I can guarandamntee you I did NOT call my Mothah and ask her if could.  AND…I don’t think I would have been honest if she had asked me.  Then…he says this to me….”I called Dad and asked him about it…” I said, “Oh really? And what did Dad say?”… Thinking that Dad had no room to say a word about it just like I didn’t.  “Dad said that I couldn’t call home and ask stuff like that. He said I had to make those decisions for myself.  So since I have a good grade in French and my math class was canceled, I decided to go.”  Damn. I would have gone if I was failing French and Math and neither were canceled, and I would never have called and asked Mothah or Daddy, because I knew what they would both say, and that was this: HELL TO THE NO!  So. In that moment, I was proud.  I was proud of Mini Me, and dammit, I was proud of ME! I must be doing something right!, Right? I mean, he could have been lying his ass off.  I get that. We won’t really know until grades come out.  But, I can have this teeny weeny little time of satisfaction in a job well done, can’t I? Can’t I????

*Epilogue

Let me say that I am not stupid. I know that Mini Me is definitely not sitting up in Nashville, reading a Bible and going to bed at 8pm. Please. Why do you think I call him Mini Me? 🤪 Also, notice that the title says “Maybe I am doing something right” not “Maybe I am doing everything right” because GOD KNOWS and I know I certainly am not doing and have definitely not done everything right! Who has? Show me that person so I can beat their ass. Finally, a couple of days after he got home from his little trip to Athens, MM texted me this pic. He said, “Look! I was featured on UGA’s Instagram!” I had to laugh. My kid. I do love him so.